Jots & Tittles

012

Blowing Apart the Red Sea

Will scientific explanations for biblical miracles never cease? The latest theory—a scenario involving shallow reefs, high winds and 600,000 Israelite slaves fleeing Egypt—is actually not new, but a pair of Russian mathematicians connected with St. Petersburg’s Institute of Oceanology have given it new precision by working the numbers.

In an article called “Modeling the Hydrodynamic Situation During the Exodus,” published in the Bulletin of the Russian Academy of Sciences, Naum Volzinger, of the institute, and his Hamburg-based colleague Alexei Androsov presented the results of a six-month study to determine the exact meteorological conditions necessary for the Red Sea to part long enough for the fleeing Israelites to get across.

The Bible says that “Moses held out his hand over the sea, and the Lord drove the sea away with a strong east wind all night long, and turned the seabed into dry land” (Exodus 14:21). The Gulf of Suez, the narrow, shallow finger of the Red Sea that extends northwestward toward the Mediterranean (see photo), has already been proposed as a likely place for the Israelites’ nocturnal crossing. The Russian team follows earlier scientists in saying that a strong wind could have dried part of this gulf long enough for the Israelites to pass.^a Volzinger and Androsov focused their calculations on a 4-mile-long reef in 013the northern part of the gulf, where in biblical times the water was only about 10 feet deep at low tide.

The wind, say the scientists, would have had to blow at 67 miles per hour “all night long” (as the Bible says) to dry the reef. It would have taken the 600,000 fugitives four hours to cross to the farther shore. When the winds let up, the waters would have returned within a half hour, the scientists calculated—thereby drowning the Egyptian pursuers.

Volzinger told the Moscow Times, “I am convinced that God rules the earth through the laws of physics.”

Teen Bible

No style-conscious teenage girl, however devout, would want to tote her big family Bible to the swimming pool or a friend’s sleepover. At least that’s the thinking behind Revolve, a new publication that presents the complete New Testament (New Century Version) in fashion magazine format.

The publisher of Revolve, Transit Books, found in its research that the main reason teens avoid the Bible like the plague is that it is “too big and freaky looking.” Their repackaged Good Book is one of a slew of new specialty Bibles on bookstore shelves designed to spread the Word to different niche markets. There are now Bibles out there specifically for professionals, for sports fans, for those recovering from substance abuse—you name it.

The Bible-cum-teen-’zine Revolve features the usual staples of women’s magazines but gives them a biblical twist: There are Top Ten lists (“Top Ten Great Christian Books”), quizzes (“Are You Dating a Godly Guy?”), “Bible Bios” (profiles of Esther, Mary and other biblical women) and an advice column, “Blab.” It even offers Christian beauty tips, such as the following: “Make sure you keep your speech pure. Imagine putting on ‘spiritual lipstick’ every morning in preparation for the day’s conversations.”

Revolve can be ordered online from www.thomasnelson.com.

012

Byzantium at the Met

Much of the world’s greatest Christian art was produced in the Middle Ages in the Eastern Roman Empire—called (after the fact) by the romantic name Byzantium. Now visitors to the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York can view over 350 masterpieces from the last centuries of Byzantine culture—one of its most artistically rich periods.

“Byzantium: Faith and Power 1261–1557” presents paintings, textiles, decorative art and liturgical objects from 30 countries—including Greece, Russia, Italy, the former Yugoslav republics and Egypt. Included in the exhibition are 40 icons from the Holy Monastery of Saint Catherine at Sinai, including the icon of the archangel Gabriel shown.

The 300-year period of artistic flowering represented by this exhibition began in 1261, when the Byzantine capital Constantinople was returned to imperial control after a brief, culturally stagnant period of Western rule. The empire, which thought of itself as the “New Rome,” came to an end when Constantinople fell to the Ottoman Turks two centuries later, in 1453. But Byzantium’s cultural influence persisted—in the West, where it helped inspire the Italian Renaissance, as well as in the Islamic world and in the remaining areas of Eastern Christianity like Greece and Russia. These legacies of Byzantium will also be explored in the exhibition.

“Byzantium” runs from March 23 until July 4. For more information, visit www.metmuseum.org or call 212-570-3710.

013

The Bible in the News

In his new book, An American Jesus, Stephen Prothero explores the many ways in which Americans have attempted to portray Jesus in their own image (or images). This continues to be common practice today, as a quick survey of recent references to Jesus in the popular press confirms. Americans (and not only Americans) continue to shape Jesus into a proponent or an opponent of almost any imaginable (and some unimaginable) phenomenon or cause.

Take, for example, this assessment of Jesus and fashion. According to an editor at Thomas Nelson Publishers, quoted in The New York Times (Sept. 14, 2003), “Christ was not exactly a fashion plate.” She continues: “I would say that Christ resisted fashion. He was not treated like a king, and he did not have the apparel of a king. He walked a lot, and it wasn’t as if he was wearing Cole Haan.”

The producers of a recent revival of “Jesus Christ Superstar” disagree (Alameda Times-Star, Sept. 26, 2003): “Apparently in [their] Jerusalem there’s no shortage of hair-care products. The apostles look like a boy band (the gospels of Justin, Joey, Lance, JC and Christ, anyone?). Jesus shops at the Gap while his followers are more inclined toward fashions from Old Navy … Jesus’ followers are a rabid lot who could just as easily be following the ups and downs of Ben and JLo as the heavenly proclamations of a carpenter from Nazareth.”

Did Jesus wear denim? The makers of Jesus Jeans apparently think so, although the British Patent Office disagrees. The office recently denied an application to sell Jesus Jeans in Britain (but it’s okay in Belgium, the Netherlands, Luxembourg, Austria, France, Italy and Spain—as reported in “‘Morally Offensive’ Jesus Jeans Miss the Mark,” London Times, Dec. 11, 2003).

Perhaps there is greater agreement on what Jesus ate. As determined by Dr. Don Colbert in his popular Bible Cure series, “Jesus essentially ate a Mediterranean diet rich in whole grains, fish, fruit and vegetables and with modest amounts of olive oil, meat and wine.” But what would Jesus eat today? Some Christians advocate vegetarianism, saying that “if Jesus were alive today, he would maintain a plant-based diet out of compassion for animals.” In the view of others, “Jesus would probably approve of genetically modified food, given his propensity for transforming and multiplying food.” There seems to be no orthodoxy of opinion here either, although “getting someone to drop 20 pounds in the name of Jesus is not the worst heresy.” (All of this is reported in the Los Angeles Times, Aug. 30, 2003.)

It is not surprising that many of the modern images of Jesus are partisan, if not overtly political. Bumper stickers provided by the Evangelical Environmental Network ask, “What Would Jesus Drive?” In spreading their “gospel of fuel efficiency and clean air,” they assert: “Obeying Jesus in our transportation choices is one of the great Christian obligations and opportunities of the 21st century.” But what is the proper choice? Some have argued that it is the Toyota Prius hybrid car. Others insist on their divine-given right to travel around in a large vehicle, in spite of the “dark forces arrayed against SUV drivers” (LA Weekly, July 25, 2003).

As the 2004 election year began, increasing numbers of stories were graced with titles like “Many Pols Seems to Think God’s Rooting for Them” (Richmond Times-Dispatch, Jan. 16, 2004), if not speaking directly to them.

If this all seems too much, we might pause to remember that “there’s nothing new about creating a Jesus who looks like you” (Cleveland Plain Dealer, Dec. 21, 2003). As noted by sociologist Andrew Greeley, “Much of the history of Christianity has been devoted to domesticating Jesus.” He concludes: “None of it works because once you domesticate Jesus he isn’t there any more” (Chicago Sun-Times, Jan. 16, 2004). But this insight is not likely to stop or even slow down the image-making at the ethereal heights of theology, much less at the decidedly more down-to-earth level of the purveyors and consumers of popular culture.

Blowing Apart the Red Sea